Dreams and Nightmares

Throughout our separation I had terrible nightmares about Ed being with other women, attacking me, breaking into my house and killing me in my bed.  Now that everything is finalized and he is with the whore that has changed.  Last night I dreamt that he called me to apologize for all the terrible things that he did during our marriage, separation and divorce.  He couldn’t, even in my sleep, come clean for all the LIES that he told over all those years.  I still don’t feel as though I can forgive him for all the pain that he caused and I doubt that he will ever be accountable for the damage! 

I think it may have been prompted by his mother calling Sunday night.  I ordered her a mother’s day present yesterday from Erik.  Even though they are not biologically related she was a good grandmother to him!

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